"Argue for your limitations and they are yours." Richard Bach, Author, Illusions
This weekend, I watched the ground-breaking movie ... for about the fourth time, "What The Bleep Do We Know?!" If you have not seen it yet, put it at the top of your list. If you have seen it, watch it again. I guarantee that you will pick up powerful tidbits you did not catch before.
What makes this a "must see" movie?
Part documentary, part narrative drama and part visual hallucinogen, the main purpose of the movie - regardless of whether you agree or disagree with its theses -is to get you to shift your paradigms about your experience of life and reality.
Integrating interviews with top scientists,neurobiologists and quantum physicists... amazing animation and special effects ... and a storyline featuring Oscar winner Marlee Matlin as a jaded photographer who falls down a metaphysical rabbit hole, this movie promises - if you keep an open mind - to provoke, transform and rattle every limited belief you ever had about life. For the biggest skeptics, it explains from a quantum physics perspective how your mind and perceptions drive every experience and outcome in your life. That includes every aspect of your business right now.
In this viewing of the movie, the stopper was an interviewee's comment that "we are addicted to our emotions." i.e., we have a chemical addiction to rejection, conflict, fear, etc. Think about it. Don't you know people who actually get "hooked" on stress and crises? Such states cause a chemical reaction in the body, triggering the "fight or flight" adrenaline response. As a result, we get addicted to the adrenaline "high."
From an NLP (NeuroLinguistic Programming) perspective, there is a comparable notion called "secondary gains." Ever had those challenges in your business that no matter how hard you tried to overcome them, you got no shift in results? Or a goal you aggressively pursued with marginal progress?
"Secondary gains" are unconscious benefits for staying stuck. These secondary gains make you "addicted" to your limitations. On a conscious level, this notion sounds crazy. Afterall, why would you rather stay stuck in your challenges than achieve your desired goals or outcomes?
Example: A former client came to me struggling to make the necessary marketing calls to grow her business. She knew "what" she needed to do. She had spent thousand's of $$'s on the best seminars from top industry producers and had a proven system to replicate success. Despite the best of conscious intentions and effort, her results were dismal.
Like most people, however, she thought her issue was a superficial one - ie., needing to better manage time. It was not. Within 30 minutes of our coaching session, we uncovered the real reason ... the secondary gain ... why she struggling in her business.
The underlying reason ... If she became successful in her business, she would no longer have an excuse/reason to stay in her failing marriage. As long as she was dependant on her husband financially, she could justify why she needed to stay. As illogical as it may sound to someone not in the situation, our behaviors and choices are anything but rational. They are driven by emotions and beliefs, oftentimes not for positive reasons.
Uncovering "secondary gains" is critical to realizing that next BIG success breakthrough. If you are stuck or not realizing results in any aspect of your business or profession ...
ASK YOURSELF ...
" what's the benefit of NOT achieving my goal or vision?"
